Because I plan to have shining successes in the future, I need to be brutally honest about weeks like these. I am just scraping through and for no good reason at all. I think sometimes parenting is a chore or a job, and I hate feeling that way. But I do the job anyway I guess. It's not going to be well done, in many ways you could say it has not even been done because I have not lived up to my ideals and I can see that reflected back to me from my child. "Anything worth doing is worth doing badly" Chesterton is quoted to have said. So it's one foot in front of the other time. This is what will distinguish me. I pass to my child a genetic legacy of depression and unhealthiness spiraling into heart breaking abuse. But this time, this generation, I'm going to give her some tools to go along with it. One of those tools might just be sitting here and crying for a little bit. And then it's time to get on with it. Mr. Rogers is good for the soul.